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The DeAndr'Ankings: Volume III

Welcome back, friends, to the show that never ends (except for after about 800 words when this joke gets old). This is the first ever volume III of the DeAndr'Ankings - the definitive home of ranking the NBA's players who share the name DeAndre (or some for thereof). It's an inexact science, but it's one of the most important processes in the history of the planet and anyone who tells you otherwise can kick rocks.

As usual, I'll address a few questions before getting started.

Q1: For the third time, is this really necessary?

Yes. Next question.

Q2: Is there a way to gamble on who is going to end up number one by season's end?

No. Well, yes? If you want to make a bet on it, find someone and say "I'll bet you..." and that'll be that, I guess. Don't make me think for you, think for yourself.

Q3: Are any of these guys actually any good?

Yes. They're far better than I am at basketball and they're at least that much better than me at having a high-paying job.

Q4: What happens if DeAndre Liggins signs somewhere since he's not officially retired but didn't appear on an NBA roster last year? Won't that destroy the experiment since his name is spelled the same way as DeAndre Jordan?

Life uh...finds a way.

Q5: Ready?

Ready.


THE THIRD DEANDR'ANKINGS: THROUGH DECEMBER 19, 2019

4. DeAndre' Bembry

There's a shakeup to start the rankings! That's the good news. The bad news is particularly bad if you're a member of the Bembry family. DeAndre' has fallen almost completely out of the rotation..for the Atlanta Hawks, who are one of the worst teams in the NBA. Bembry played 28 seconds in a loss, registered a DNP the following game, and then got back in for 12 minutes in a game where the Hawks got throttled by the New York Knicks. He registered 20+ minutes in a tight loss to the Jazz Friday night, and was fine, but not much beyond fine.

Bembry scored zero points on 0-1 shooting in his first 3 games this week. He had four rebounds in those games. The committee acknowledges that one of the other members of Club DA (something we're trying out. Let us know.) played in just one game this week, but it's hard to be notably less productive than DeAndre' was for most of this week.

Last week's rank: 3

3. Deandre Ayton

Movement! Ayton is back, which is exciting, but it must have sucked to show up and have your first game back be against the Clippers. Still, Deandre posted a handy little 18/12 line, blocked a shot, and was a -9 in a game that the Suns lost by 21. He played about 24 minutes, which is an OK number considering he'd missed two months, and the committee expects him to climb up the rankings as we go. Some might suggest he's better than at least one of the guys ahead of him, but that someone isn't doing the DeAndr'ankings, are they?

That's what I thought.

Tough to give a guy a ton of credit for playing in one game, but Ayton's one game included more points and rebounds than Bembry had in four games. 

Last week's rank: 4

2. De'Andre Hunter

The consistency of DAH in these rankings has been perhaps the most impressive thing about his season. He's been #2 each week and has done nothing to vault himself into the top spot, but also hasn't fallen behind his teammate. His real danger is of dropping behind Ayton, but as the committee mentioned above, Ayton hasn't played enough to make this jump yet. However, it feels like it's coming. Hunter shall become the hunted.

Sorry.

Anyway, De'Andre had a couple of nice scoring games this week, but didn't shoot the ball well overall. He went just 2-15 from deep in their three games prior to the Jazz game last night, where he had major foul trouble for the 3rd time in a row - 14 fouls in three games is not a great habit, though it is a very rookie thing to do.

All these things add up to the #2 ranking.

Last week's rank: 2

1. DeAndre Jordan

Honestly, when I started doing these rankings I did not expect DeAndre Jordan to be #1 unless Jarrett Allen got hurt. Allen is healthy and fine, and DJ is out here pulling down double-digit rebounds in 20 minutes multiple times this season. He did that twice in a row to start the week, including a 13/11 double-double in 21 minutes in a win over the Sixers. The flip side is that the Nets appear to be getting smacked when DeAndre is on the floor. Obviously that's a team-wide issue, but he pulled down 11 rebounds in 17 minutes vs. the Spurs and was a -13. So that ain't good.

Even so, DeAndre Jordan was supposed to be max-level washed coming into this season and he was the butt of a lot of jokes when KD and Kyrie signed in Brooklyn. He's not exactly leading them to the Finals, but he's had seven games with 5+ offensive rebounds, and that's a bigtime factor in winning games.

What an honor for DJ. Each week he stays at #1 he sets the record for most consecutive weeks at #1 in the DeAndr'Ankings. Inspirational stuff.

Last week's rank: 1

Current season standings after Volume III:

4. Deandre Ayton: 4 points
3. DeAndre' Bembry: 5 points
2. De'Andre Hunter: 9 points
1. DeAndre Jordan: 12 points

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