Welcome back, friends. It's all happening. It's week two of the most thorough examination of which NBA player named DeAndre (or something thereof, with different capitalization and/or apostrophes) is the best at this exact moment in time.
Week two brings us one week closer to the return of Deandre Ayton, which will unquestionably shake up the rankings. In the meantime, let's hit some Q&A.
Q1: Is this really necessary?
What? Yes. Next question.
Q2: Are you instituting a season-long leaderboard at the end of this isntallment?
You bet your ass I am. The scoring is reverse-points: 4 points for 1st place, 1 point for 4th.
Q3: Are you insane?
No. I am perfectly sane. Everyone else however is insane and they're trying to steal my magic bag.
Q4: Are you putting a quote/reference from an outdated piece of pop culture into each question section each week and not talking about it?
Yes.
Q5: Ready?
Ready.
THE SECOND DEANDR'ANKINGS: THROUGH DECEMBER 12, 2019.
4. Deandre Ayton
Bringing up the rear is 2nd-year center Deandre Ayton. No minutes, no chance to win. But his 25-game suspension is coming to an end soon and it will be extremely interesting to see what happens to the Phoenix Suns - and far more importantly, the DeAndr'ankings - upon his return.
Last week's rank: 4
3. DeAndre' Bembry
Bembry has retained the 3rd spot in week two of the DeAndr'ankings, as he's doing better than not playing, but isn't jumping off the box score. He missed his first three 3-pointers of the week after missing five in the prior game, and scored a total of 8 points in the first two games the Hawks played this week. It's been a tough slog for Bembry, and he has found himself at the tail-end of Atlanta's wing-rotation. In his 3rd and final game of the week, DAB barely found his way off the bench in a blowout.
In a fun twist on that rotation, he's now losing minutes to Cam Reddish, who was born in 1999, and Vince Carter, who started playing in the NBA in 1998.
Last week's rank: 3
2. De'Andre Hunter
De'Andre Hunter is making a run at number one, but just fell short this week. He poured in a career-high 28 earlier in the week, but he followed it up with a 2-9 performance in a 34 point loss. If he'd played halfway decent in that final game of the week, he may have shaken up the rankings, but he's gonna have to Hunt(er) a little harder for points next week (woof. That was a tough one).
It doesn't help that the Hawks are abysmal. Maybe John Collins's return will improve things, but that's largely because it can't get much worse. The Hawks are 6-19 with the 29th ranked defense in the NBA. Maybe De'Andre can find some more steals and blocks? He'll have to start Hunt...ing for steals too.
Bye.
Last week's rank: 2
1. DeAndre Jordan
Two weeks in a row in the top spot for the 12th-year center! On the heels of his top-seed in the inaugural rankings, DJ went out and had a throwback performance last Friday night. Jordan went for 16 points, 13 rebounds, 3 assists, and 2 blocks in about 25 minutes. He dominated the paint and the Nets beat the Hornets by seven.
Was that enough? No! Wednesday night we were given a 9 point, 14 rebound stat line in 21+ minutes. Where did this guy come from? We were all certain he was a dinosaur who had no place in the modern NBA.
(Double checking something here)
The Nets lost that 2nd game to the Hornets by 5. Oh well. What can you do? Winning games is secondary to winning the Deandr'ankings. Imagine if DJ can hold on throughout the season! He's got the jump. Can he hang on? Ayton should come on strong...but you never know!
Last week's rank: 1
Current season standings after volume II:
Deandre Ayton: 2 points
DeAndre' Bembry: 4 points
De'Andre Hunter: 6 points
DeAndre Jordan: 8 points
Week two brings us one week closer to the return of Deandre Ayton, which will unquestionably shake up the rankings. In the meantime, let's hit some Q&A.
Q1: Is this really necessary?
What? Yes. Next question.
Q2: Are you instituting a season-long leaderboard at the end of this isntallment?
You bet your ass I am. The scoring is reverse-points: 4 points for 1st place, 1 point for 4th.
Q3: Are you insane?
No. I am perfectly sane. Everyone else however is insane and they're trying to steal my magic bag.
Q4: Are you putting a quote/reference from an outdated piece of pop culture into each question section each week and not talking about it?
Yes.
Q5: Ready?
Ready.
THE SECOND DEANDR'ANKINGS: THROUGH DECEMBER 12, 2019.
4. Deandre Ayton
Bringing up the rear is 2nd-year center Deandre Ayton. No minutes, no chance to win. But his 25-game suspension is coming to an end soon and it will be extremely interesting to see what happens to the Phoenix Suns - and far more importantly, the DeAndr'ankings - upon his return.
Last week's rank: 4
3. DeAndre' Bembry
Bembry has retained the 3rd spot in week two of the DeAndr'ankings, as he's doing better than not playing, but isn't jumping off the box score. He missed his first three 3-pointers of the week after missing five in the prior game, and scored a total of 8 points in the first two games the Hawks played this week. It's been a tough slog for Bembry, and he has found himself at the tail-end of Atlanta's wing-rotation. In his 3rd and final game of the week, DAB barely found his way off the bench in a blowout.
In a fun twist on that rotation, he's now losing minutes to Cam Reddish, who was born in 1999, and Vince Carter, who started playing in the NBA in 1998.
Last week's rank: 3
2. De'Andre Hunter
De'Andre Hunter is making a run at number one, but just fell short this week. He poured in a career-high 28 earlier in the week, but he followed it up with a 2-9 performance in a 34 point loss. If he'd played halfway decent in that final game of the week, he may have shaken up the rankings, but he's gonna have to Hunt(er) a little harder for points next week (woof. That was a tough one).
It doesn't help that the Hawks are abysmal. Maybe John Collins's return will improve things, but that's largely because it can't get much worse. The Hawks are 6-19 with the 29th ranked defense in the NBA. Maybe De'Andre can find some more steals and blocks? He'll have to start Hunt...ing for steals too.
Bye.
Last week's rank: 2
1. DeAndre Jordan
Two weeks in a row in the top spot for the 12th-year center! On the heels of his top-seed in the inaugural rankings, DJ went out and had a throwback performance last Friday night. Jordan went for 16 points, 13 rebounds, 3 assists, and 2 blocks in about 25 minutes. He dominated the paint and the Nets beat the Hornets by seven.
Was that enough? No! Wednesday night we were given a 9 point, 14 rebound stat line in 21+ minutes. Where did this guy come from? We were all certain he was a dinosaur who had no place in the modern NBA.
(Double checking something here)
The Nets lost that 2nd game to the Hornets by 5. Oh well. What can you do? Winning games is secondary to winning the Deandr'ankings. Imagine if DJ can hold on throughout the season! He's got the jump. Can he hang on? Ayton should come on strong...but you never know!
Last week's rank: 1
Current season standings after volume II:
Deandre Ayton: 2 points
DeAndre' Bembry: 4 points
De'Andre Hunter: 6 points
DeAndre Jordan: 8 points
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